by steven
(az)
Well I started drinking when I was about 14. The first time I started I did not like it, I got sick and threw up. But gradually I started to do it on the weekends for fun because all of my friends were doing it.
At first it was fun but than it became a point to where the only time i would have fun if i was completely drunk. I than got into a gang, began experimenting with drugs and other things, I started to lose control. As a part of my gang activity I was shot twice and worried my parents to death. I remember my mom and dad would have sleepless nights because I would come home so drunk.
It began to take its toll when I would get drunk I would become angry and cry. so many emotions would run through me, most of the time it was because my real dad killed himself when I was 4. Weekends became weekdays, nights became mornings I was drinking non-stop, than I realized I had a problem.
When I was 18 I was checked into a rehab stayed there for a while, then got out. You would think after that I would be fine, but that was just the beginning. I got right back into the mix of things, this time drinking heavier than ever. My parents had had enough so I left and went to live with my grandma, I dropped out of school and just drank like a fish. One night I was involved in a terrible accident and damaged my liver, so I told myself i cannot drink.
I quit drinking, went back to school, got my diploma, got a job things were going good. I was sober for 6 months the longest I’ve gone, man I was doing good, so I went to a party and said I could just have one drink, boy was I wrong. That one drink led to another and another and pretty soon I was jobless and back to square one. Once again I drank like a fish, but one day decided to quit again, moved back in with my parents things were going good, this time I was sober for a year.
I met a girl one night at a party (she will have a lot to do with the story later) and started to see her heavily, I was sober and happy, man things were going good. I decided I could have one drink, once again I was wrong, here we go again.
One day I went to the river a day before I was going to start my new job and got my first DUI, my moms car was towed so I called my girlfriend had her pick me up and went to her house not telling my mom. The next day my mom called me to see how things were going at my new job and if i needed lunch money, I told here I was at work lying to her man, that broke my heart. She soon found out what happened and was mad, I moved into a house with my girlfriend, man that place was a dump. She worked I was drunk all day never ate just drank, sometimes we would have no food the water would get shut off, no electricity, I did not care. I went to court and got my sentence, 10 days in jail. I began to serve my sentence during that time my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, time to sober up right. No, when I got out I was so stressed out I drank more than ever, not caring about anything, my family was so upset they wished I would never have a kid I can’t even take care of my self. My girlfriend begged and pleaded for me to stop I would just yell and and call her names, I mean I would steal beer just to drink.
One day while at my grandmas house they both begged me to stop, so I said OK. I began detox, and believe me I thought I was going to die!! I was so sick and thought it was the end. After 2 weeks of detoxing I got a job but man, I looked like crap couldn’t believe how much I had physically changed.
When our son was born it was the greatest experience of my life, better that any bottle of booze could give me. This time I stayed strong have had the same job for 6 years, we own a house now and have 2 kids. I look at my kids and could never imagine going back and hurting them, my relationship with my family is great. I now look at life and love it.
I am a Mental Health Counselor who is licensed in both New York (LMHC) and North Carolina (LCMHC). I have been working in the Mental Health field since 2015. I have worked in a residential setting, an outpatient program and an inpatient addictions program. I began working in Long Island, NY and then in Guelph, Ontario after moving to Canada. I have since settled in North Carolina. I have experience working with various stages of addiction, depression, anxiety, mood disorders, trauma, stages of life concerns and relationship concerns.
I tend to use a person-centered approach which simply means that I meet you where you are and work collaboratively to help you identify and work towards accomplishing goals. I will often pull from CBT when appropriate. I do encourage use of mindfulness and meditation and practice these skills in my own life. I believe in treating everyone with respect, sensitivity and compassion.
I recognize that reaching out for help is hard and commend you for taking the first step. We have professionals available who would be happy to help you move closer to reaching your goals related to your drinking concerns. You may reach these professionals by calling 877-322-2694.