Women for Sobriety: An Alternative to AA
Women, Alcoholism And Support Groups
Providing Alcoholism Treatment For Women
Why do women need Women for Sobriety? It has been estimated that of the 14.1 million alcohol abusers in the United States, approximately one third are women. That is a massive 4 to 5 million individuals. When we look at the different alcohol treatment programs available, there is very little options for women only.
There are differences between risks associated with alcoholism for women when compared to men. For example, women are at a higher risk for liver damage, heart disease and breast cancer when compared to men. Women who drink during pregnancy can put the fetus at risk for developing health concerns.
Many would respond to this by saying that Alcoholics Anonymous and 12-step treatment centers (by far the biggest and most popular of the alcohol dependency treatment methods) welcome both sexes.
There is no discrimination, no bias toward one sex or the other, all are welcome to attend. Explicitly this may be so, but implicitly it has proved very different for many women.
When we consider research that has been done, there is no evidence that gender-specific treatment options have better outcomes for women compared to programs with men and women.
There is however, a clear preference among some women who prefer women only programs which can contribute to their engagement in the program which would hopefully provide better gains. The question would be, can the same findings be applied to self-help meetings?
There is a small number of alcohol treatment programs that do offer women’s only treatment programs, tend to be on the more expensive side and may or may not accept insurance as coverage.
How Does Alcoholics Anonymous Alienate Women?
The main issue WFS (Women For Sobriety) has with AA can be illustrated by comparing the second step of Alcoholics Anonymous with the first affirmation of Women for Sobriety:
· The Second Step
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity
· The First Affirmation of WFS
I have a life-threatening problem that once had me.
I now take charge of my life. I accept the responsibility.
One of the main tenets of AA’s philosophy is that the recovering alcoholic needs to relinquish control, embrace humility and hand over to a ‘power’ outside of him or herself. Some identify God or another spiritual figure as their higher power, while others do not. The Big Book does reference God throughout, the belief in God is not a requirement.
Understandably a majority of women alcoholics feel alienated by this notion; many women have been powerless all their lives. They have exerted no control over in any sphere of life and have been subject to the whims of men.
This could be due to the environment they were raised in or experiences they had. Childhood experiences with abuse and neglect can contribute to this feeling as well.
For many women, their very powerlessness has been one of the causes of their drinking. That is why, as seen in the first affirmation above, those in WFS do not look outside themselves for the power to defeat alcoholism. Inner strength and determination are the key.
By having a focus on inner strength, participants are given the opportunity to work on the underlying concerns that led to their feelings of powerlessness. Many find this to be empowering and encouraging them to improve the relationship that they have for themselves.
Thus is not to say WFS is anti-AA. In the 1990s a survey revealed that one third of women who went to WFS group meetings also regularly attended AA meetings.
WFS is an additional tool that women can add to their toolbox for recovery.
Alcoholics Anonymous and WFS
Similarities
There are many similarities between the two groups:
· Both advocate complete abstention from alcohol
· Both have group meetings in which members support, share and learn from one another
· Both are non-profit making, relying on donations and sales of books for funding
· Both have at their core a list of essential ‘truths’ or ‘commandments’ (For AA the 12 steps and for WFS, the 13 affirmations)
· Neither has a central figure at their head, meetings follow similar patterns but are essentially autonomous
Alcoholics Anonymous and WFS
Differences
Where WFS differs from AA:
- The power to defeat alcoholism comes from within not outside of yourself in WFS
- Only women may attend Women For Sobriety meetings. However, WFS is not anti-man or radically feminist
- Alcoholism in men and women is physiologically the same, but on the psychological level it is very different.
- WFS is small, there are around 300 groups around the world compared to the tens of thousands run by Alcoholics Anonymous members
A Brief History of Women for Sobriety
Women for Sobriety was set up by Jean Kirkpatrick in 1975 after suffering from alcoholism for many years. Having tried AA and other treatments for her condition, she seemed a lost cause.
But then she began to read Ralph Waldo Emerson and more specifically his essay ‘Self-Reliance’. From Emerson’s writings and those of other thinkers she began to deal with alcohol by first dealing with her thoughts.- she realized negative thoughts/feelings led to negative action (in her case drinking). By applying this theory she was able to control and eventually quit drinking altogether.
With her new found knowledge and technique, Jean Kirkpatrick set in motion what was to eventually become Women for Sobriety. An alcoholic self-help group that promotes the power of the individual to overcome alcoholism rather than an outside power.
This is, at least in my opinion, the central tenet of the WFS not the fact that it is only open to women. This is reflected in the fact that a separate group has now been set up called MFS, Men For Sobriety utilizing Jean Kirkpatrick’s recovery ideal.
How does Women for Sobriety Work?
This program encourages:
· self-empowerment
· self-acceptance
· increased self-esteem
These qualities can be realized by repeating the 13 affirmations every day when you wake (self-reinforcement).
The 13 Affirmations
1. I have a life-threatening problem that once had me.
I now take charge of my life. I accept the responsibility.
2. Negative thoughts destroy only myself.
My first conscious act must be to remove negativity from my life.
3. Happiness is a habit I will develop.
Happiness is created, not waited for.
4. Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to.
I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me.
5. I am what I think.
I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.
6. Life can be ordinary or it can be great.
Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.
7. Love can change the course of my world.
Caring becomes all important.
8. The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth.
Daily I put my life into a proper order, knowing which are the priorities.
9. The past is gone forever.
No longer will I be victimized by the past, I am a new person.
10. All love given returns.
I will learn to know that others love me.
11. Enthusiasm is my daily exercise.
I treasure all moments of my new life.
12. I am a competent woman and have much to give life.
This is what I am and I shall know it always.
13. I am responsible for myself and for my actions.
I am in charge of my mind, my thoughts, and my life.
Group meetings are also an essential part of the program. These groups are used for much the same reason as they are in AA. That is a place for members to share their stories of, struggles with, and recovery from, alcoholism. It offers a place for women to connect with each other and build their sober support network.
Other options available through the WFS program is phone support and online support. Women For Sobriety have a presence on several social media outlets, such as Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Having multiple different avenues to access support can be convenient in times that make it difficult to travel to meetings.
Some women may find that they are able to share more in a WFS meeting compared to an AA meeting due to the group being only women. For some, having this underlying commonality can help develop a sense of similarity and safety in the group.
WFS Literature is available through the official WFS website, and the brochures give you a good idea of what the program involves and how to access it.
There is also an online aspect to Women for Sobriety, called WFS Online. Due to the small number of WFS groups this is a very useful tool for women who can’t get to meetings for whatever reason.
You have to register with the site first and approval can take some time. Patience is the key. If you are interested in learning more about alcoholism in women, this link can be a helpful resource.
Alcoholism Chooses No Gender. Stop the Cycle Today!
Regardless of gender, alcoholism can cause adverse mental, physical, and sociological effects on the alcoholic. Stop the cycle today. If you or your loved one is battling with alcoholism, help is available. Contact a treatment provider today to know more about the alcoholism treatment options and programs ideal for you.
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I am a Mental Health Counselor who is licensed in both New York (LMHC) and North Carolina (LCMHC). I have been working in the Mental Health field since 2015. I have worked in a residential setting, an outpatient program and an inpatient addictions program. I began working in Long Island, NY and then in Guelph, Ontario after moving to Canada. I have since settled in North Carolina. I have experience working with various stages of addiction, depression, anxiety, mood disorders, trauma, stages of life concerns and relationship concerns.
I tend to use a person-centered approach which simply means that I meet you where you are and work collaboratively to help you identify and work towards accomplishing goals. I will often pull from CBT when appropriate. I do encourage use of mindfulness and meditation and practice these skills in my own life. I believe in treating everyone with respect, sensitivity and compassion.
I recognize that reaching out for help is hard and commend you for taking the first step. We have professionals available who would be happy to help you move closer to reaching your goals related to your drinking concerns. You may reach these professionals by calling 877-322-2694.